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31/10/2016 1 Comment the real length of my journeyI shared my blog with a couple friends yesterday and one of my closest friends told me, "6 weeks? You've been on this journey since the mid 90's!"
I guess I can't really argue with that. Back then was really when I started to explore my gender. My time at home was largely spent wearing women's clothing. I was out to many of my friends as a crossdresser, but I never went out in public. I had a hard time even going into the public spaces in my apartment building. And over the years, that is pretty much the level I stayed at. It wasn't until this year, and really just the last month where I have been out. Except for just a couple hours this past month, I have been living full time as a transgender woman. Everyone tells me how happy I look and I am constantly gendered accurately when I am out in public. It is awesome! Here is a picture of me taken back in the 90's. I still have the dress too, but not those glasses. What was I thinking.
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30/10/2016 0 Comments BirthdayYesterday was my 53rd birthday! I had a wonderful day. It started off with a massage. Since it was my birthday, I got a bonus 1/2 and hour which was wonderful. After that I hung out with a friend for awhile. We had lunch and drinks at a very nice venue in St. Paul. a Corpse Reviver #2 and Steak frites. Both were wonderful. After lunch we wandered around playing Pokemon Go for awhile before going home to get ready for dinner with my wife.
First I had a quick nap with the cats. Then I started getting ready. Makeup and fixing my hair and picking out which dress I wanted to wear for the night. I was ready in plenty of time for our reservation, but the Mrs. was nowhere to be found! She had gone over to her sisters earlier in the day, so I called her. She hadn't left yet! I start worrying about our reservations while I waited for her to get home. Once she got home, we absolutely needed to leave right away. I am dressed in one of my nicest dresses, all made up, and her in jeans and a flannel shirt! It was pretty amusing, with our switched gender rolls. We made it to the sushi place just a few minutes late. We were seated at the bar and we let the sake and sushi flow. This is one of the top sushi restaurants in the country, so I let them have free reign on what I had. It was amazing! I loved every single bite! All in all, it was a wonderful day! 27/10/2016 0 Comments Hormone examYesterday I had my initial exam with the doctor that will be prescribing my HRT. Over all it went very well. Since there is a history of heart disease in the family, she checked me for any signs of that and found none. The only concern was that my blood pressure was high. This happens to me frequently at the doctor, so I am going to be checking it over the next week or two and reporting back to her. Tomorrow I get to go have the lab tests done and if all is good, I will be on HRT by Thanksgiving! I never thought this would happen to me and I am incredibly excited!
23/10/2016 0 Comments CloserI talked with my youngest brother the other day and he told me that when talking with mom, he had said that this is probably the best thing to happen to our family. The two of us are closer than we have every been and hopefully that will continue to my other brother and mom.
In other news, yesterday I went out in "boy drag" for the first time really in 3 weeks. By "boy drag" I mean its a drag to be a boy! On my way to the convention I was attending, I was really hit with the dysphoria. That continued through the night. It was kinda tough. Now I am going to go get a mani-pedi to help get over it. 21/10/2016 0 Comments A slow weekIt has been a relatively slow week for me, but the few people I have talked to about my life have continued to be awesome. I have apparently done very well in finding friends that are cool!
Next week however will be a flurry of things. Monday is therapy, Tuesday is electrolysis and Wednesday is my first appointment with the doctor who will hopefully get me started on HRT. That won't happen with the first appointment, but assuming I check out in good health, I will get to start with my next appointment. 19/10/2016 0 Comments Public RestroomsI have long felt uncomfortable using the Men's restrooms in public spaces. I feel small and vulnerable. When ever possible, I would use the stalls versus the urinals, but that isn't always an option. Fortunately, I have never been hassled in a restroom, but there certainly have been many double takes over the years. Guys that I assume thought they walked into the wrong room. Mind you, this is all happening while I am dressed as a guy.
Since I have gone full time, I have used the Women's restrooms and wow, do I feel different. Safe and secure. And some of the restrooms are amazing! Nordstroms, I'm looking at you! 19/10/2016 0 Comments BrasI have now given up completely using breast forms. I thank discovering a company that makes bras with large band sizes and small cups. Finally a bra that fits my build! I have been wearing them now for most of this past year. They aren't perfect, but I nearly cried the first time I put one on! Those were the Flatter Me Bras from here: http://www.shop.ittybittybra.com/Flatter-Me-Bra_c10.htm
Just last week I ordered three bras from a UK company that also specializes in small cup bras. They have even smaller cups and they are half the price of the Flatter Me Bras. Hopefully they will arrive quickly and fit well. Of course I will have to revisit bra shopping once I see some growth when I start HRT, but it is still nice to have bras without forms. https://www.littlewomen.com/ 18/10/2016 0 Comments It's hard to believeThat it has only been 6 weeks since I started my journey. I have been so happy. I don't think twice about going out wearing the clothes that feel most comfortable to me. I get treated as if I am the person I feel I am. I still get hit with the dysphoria. Driving through campus to drop off or pick up my wife can be hard since there are so many women to remind me of what I don't have as far as shape goes. I hope that once I am on HRT that this will slowly go away.
This week has been a week without therapy. I miss not having an appointment, but the rest of the year will be every week! And next week is my physical for the HRT. I don't foresee any problems there. And hair removal is such a pain! I can deal with the physical pain just fine, it is the slow progress! That is the bad thing about being in my 50s. Laser can only get so much of the hair. 15/10/2016 0 Comments A tough weekI told my mom earlier this week and she has not been taking it well. I won't go into details, but my sister-in-law has been talking with her and it sounds like she will be going into therapy herself. This will be a good thing for her. On the plus side, my wife and I went to the mall this week and the sales person at my favorite shop showed me a dress that she liked. I tried it on and, damn! I looked good in it. I wish I had an occasion to wear it, but I opted to save my money because I really will be needing a winter coat this year and being a tall girl, that doesn't come cheap. I also contacted my stylist because I wanted to get bangs cut and didn't want to wait until my next cut and color. She got me in the same day. Loving them!
11/10/2016 0 Comments Photos from the weekendI spent a wonderful girls day with a good friend on Saturday. We had breakfast at a favorite spot before going shopping at the Mall of America. We stopped for a drink before leaving the mall. Sunday I got to see an old friend who only recently moved back into town after 10 years. She was very happy for me.
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